Diving into Threesomes: Two D’s, One V, or Two V’s, One D. How to Navigate the Online Dating Minefield

Image Credit, Geralt

Ladies, if you’re looking to add a little extra spice to your relationship by inviting a third into your romantic escapades, you’re in for an adventure – and maybe a few laughs! Here’s a hilariously helpful tip to navigate this intriguing territory:

When you mention you’re seeking a third, be prepared for a few misunderstandings. Most guys see the word “threesome” and their minds immediately conjure up images of themselves sandwiched between two lovely ladies in a passionate whirlwind. But when they read further and realize your partner is another dude, you can practically hear the mental record scratch from miles away.

To save everyone from those awkward “Oh, wait, what?” moments, clarity is your best friend. Try adding a playful and precise line to your profile: “Looking for an adventurous third to join me and my boyfriend – yes, that’s one V and two Ds. If that sounds like a fun twist to your fantasy, swipe right and let the fun begin!”

By laying it out upfront, you’ll attract those who are genuinely interested and comfortable with the dynamic you’re proposing. It also helps filter out the ones who might feel a bit too threatened by your boyfriend’s presence, or dare we say, his superior skills in the bedroom dance-off.

Now, let’s address the elephant in the room: safety and jealousy. First off, ensure you and your partner are rock-solid and on the same page about bringing someone new into your boudoir. It’s all fun and games until someone starts feeling overshadowed in the mattress mambo. Open communication and setting clear boundaries are key. After all, you want this to be an exciting adventure, not a dramatic episode of ‘Real Housewives of Threesomeville.’

Also, consider the practicalities. If you’re the only V with two Ds, ensure everyone’s safety and comfort. Discuss expectations, preferences, and limits beforehand. It might sound like a buzzkill, but trust me, it’s better than a surprise plot twist mid-action.

Remember, online dating can be a wild ride, and tempering your expectations can help. If you’re not seeing a long line of suitors eager to join you and your beau in the bedroom Olympics, don’t get discouraged. Quality over quantity, ladies. You’re seeking someone who’s genuinely into your specific setup, not just any thrill-seeker who’s misread your intentions.

Lastly, a little humor goes a long way. Keep your profile light and fun, showing off your playful side while making your intentions clear. Something like: “Dreaming of a threesome but with a twist – it’s me and my awesome boyfriend. If you’re up for a unique adventure and aren’t scared of a little swordfight, we might just be your perfect match!”

Dear expectations lead to better experiences. Happy hunting, and may your adventure be as wild and wonderful as you hope – just with fewer misunderstandings and more laughter. Swipe smart, stay safe, and enjoy the journey!